Time to get down to business, and today’s business is the word “Force“. I have come to the conclusion that the word “force” makes just about any title cooler. Any business venture I now embark upon will include the word “force” somewhere. Think about it, how much cooler would your life seem if there was more “force” in it? Heading out to dry cleaner force, stopping off at video force, maybe picking up some donuts at Donut force. The list is endless, Accounting force, paralegal force, notary public force, vet force, grocery force, pizza force, pub force, bar force, food force, gas force…
And let us not overlook the appeal this could have for young people. Who wouldn’t rather go to Elementary Force than “school” or College Force than “community college”. Reading Force instead of the library. It’s all about how you market these things I’ve decided. It’s not that kids don’t like school, it’s just not exciting, it doesn’t capture their imaginations. It’s not that kids don’t like vegetables, they just aren’t marketed properly. “Would you like some more broccoli force son?” “Booyah! broccoli force kicks ass!” A lot of good could come from this 5 letter word.
on May 30th, 2007 at 9:16 am #
Simpsons did it! Simpsons did it! (not quite, but similar):
“You have been chosen to join the Justice Squadron, 8 A.M. Monday at the Municipal Fortress of Vengeance.” - Episode AABF18, “They Saved Lisa’s Brain”
I don’t think I’d like to eat broccoli force, but I would eat broccoli if it would make me a member of The Broccoli Force (not affiliated with The Green Giants). If Daniel Day Lewis has taught us anything, its that gangs are cool.
on May 30th, 2007 at 3:24 pm #
Using a marketing format designed for 10-14 year old boys for a service only women need:
Woman: “Oh dear, I’m having some woman issues…”
*cue lasers, smoke and pounding bassline*
Announcer (preferably a pro wrestler): “This looks like a job for GYNO-FORCE!”
*wailing guitars with F-16 fly over*
on May 30th, 2007 at 4:42 pm #
If you are aiming for the 10-14 year-old demographic you also have to have skateboarders ejecting out of said F-16 and they’ll be carrying water guns! and as they do massive backslip-offside-ollies they’ll be squirting their chump parents! Hahaha!
on May 30th, 2007 at 10:03 pm #
I am a woman! I am interested in this product, unless it’s one of those gross women’s issues, in which case
-Wait all women’s issues are gross! How did I get stuck with this crappy gender?!
on May 31st, 2007 at 3:16 pm #
“In your face, female gender!”, he says as he sprouts thick bushels of hair from his nostrils and ears and his prostate explodes.